I woke up this morning troubled by many things: some are just wisps of bad dreams in the night, but others I must face.
I turned, as is my habit, to the Scriptures of Morning Prayer[1]
“Jesus was deeply troubled” jumped out at me.
What does it mean to be troubled?
The word is tarássō in Greek. “To trouble” means to shake up something that should be still; to cause agitation; to get too stirred up inside. Not only do I feel like that, I recognize the word from the part of John’s gospel we’re reading as we approach the days of Christ’s Passion:
- Jesus is “deeply moved in spirit and troubled” at Mary of Bethany’s grief over Lazarus (Jn 11:33, see too vs. 38).
- After his triumphal entry, his soul is “troubled” when he spoke of the need for those who love him, to follow him in death (Jn 12:27).
- Then on Holy Thursday, he is “troubled in spirit” knowing Judas will betray him (Jn 13:21).

Detail, “Jesus Wept” by James Tissot (Brooklyn Museum, public domain)
All this agitation in the span of three chapters. It strikes me that Jesus knows. He knows what it means to be troubled by sadness and evil. He knows the pain of unbelief and betrayal and death. He knows what that does to the soul. He knows.
To be or not to be? … troubled, that is
Which is why it’s beautiful to see how Jesus uses the word next. After telling Peter he would deny him three times, which must certainly have troubled his soul, Jesus says
“Let not your hearts be troubled” (Jn 14:1).
Then, after saying he must leave:
“Peace I leave with you; my peace I give to you; not as the world gives do I give to you. Let not your hearts be troubled, neither let them be afraid” (Jn 14:27).
I think again of how Jesus slept through the storm on the Sea of Galilee. Now that’s the kind of peace I want. Inner peace that is not troubled (shaken, agitated, stirred up) by turmoil on on the outside.
Jesus gives us his peace
Peace I leave with you, he said; my peace I give you. A peace that in spite of trouble, rests in trust.
“Jesus was deeply troubled.” He knows all of our troubles. It’s why he went to the Cross and left us with peace.

Dove of Peace statue by Michael Scheuermann. Photo: Elliott Brown from Birmingham, United Kingdom / CC BY-SA (https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/2.0)
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Come Into the Word with Me…
Last Sunday, we entered Jerusalem with Christ and (virtually!) waved palm branches in royal welcome. All this week, we walk with him toward the Cross. Spend time with him in John’s gospel, starting with 12:20 (right after the Triumphal Entry). Soak in the Lord’s final words, particularly those between that and his betrayal[2], and take them to heart. What do you hear? I’d love to know.
© 2020 Sarah Christmyer
[1] I use Magnificat magazine for this, and recommend it highly for prayerful reflection! They’re offering complimentary web access during this time of shelter-in-place, so you can check it out if you aren’t familiar with it.
[2] Jesus’s so-called “farewell discourse,” his final words to his disciples between the Last Supper and the Garden of Gethsemane, is in John 14-17.
Thank you for sharing your insights into this Scripture passage. Every time I read someone’s scriptural interpretation I learn more and it helps me to study and pray with the passage and hopefully become closer to the Word so I can live it! Blessings always!??
I have been meditating on this section of John’s gospel all week. They are so beautiful. One minute I feel like it’s a type of love letter to me. A love letter that tells me exactly what I need to do to live forever with Jesus and the Father. As if Jesus is begging me to listen to him. The next minute I am right next to Jesus listening to Him as He prays to Our Father. He isn’t just praying to God… He is imploring God on our behalf. And I get to listen in!! There is so much I love about these passages, but two in particular really move my soul.
John 15:11 …… “These things I have spoken to you, that my joy may be in you, and that your joy may be full.” Jesus wants to give ME—HIS joy!! The very joy He shares with The Father!!! He wants to give it to ME!!! It fills me with joy to even type it!!
I also love: John 17:24 ….”Father I desire that they also, whom you have given me, may be with me where I am, to behold my glory which you have given me in your love for me before the foundation of the world.” WOW … Just the beginning of His words blow me away… “Father I desire..”?. Did you hear that??? Our Lord and Savior… King of Kings, Lord of Lords, Son of God,…. HE HAS A DESIRE ! He who is all powerful… performed countless miracles… He who is consubstantial with the Father has a desire!?!? And what does He desire?? That I/We may be with Him where He is…AND behold His glory!! He desires me and you!! His love just overwhelms me. It’s incomprehensible. I could go on and on about these passages. They describe a love story like no other. A love story that includes me and you. Even in my unworthiness… He desires me!
These passages in the gospel of John fill my soul✨?✨
Rose, that is so beautiful! Thank you for sharing it. Grace and peace, Sarah
Christina, I hope you do! Blessings on you and yours this Holy Week. Sarah.